Hap's Post
Thursday, September 27, 2007
I was surfing net yesterday and I saw this.
My Sec School Songs
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wP-2cGVVSA8
and this Around SQS
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tpa6nF_K5E
OMG I was so surprise, gave YL the add. We ended up chatting about secondary school. I miss my secondary school, the teachers and friends there. Haha, if I were to be a teacher may be I can consider going back to SQS.. Haha... Wanna post the video here but I don knwo how to. any kind soul around to guide me??
Hap | 9/27/2007 07:08:00 AM
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Hap's Post
Monday, September 24, 2007
Nothing much happen last thursady to saturday. its just work, sch and home or work,OT, tkd...
But I miss all my fwens all of them from pri, sec , poly and tkd...
Something happen last night, I cannot comment much cos I know very little. I just hope Darling will make the right choice...
AND today is my unluncky day... Very unlucky. Raining when I come to work, it was so big and does not seems like its going to stop any sooner, so I ran at first was w/o my sandles. After I got to a sheltered place, I wore my sandles.I thought I just had to run across the road, up the stairs and i will reach my workplace so I ran with my sandles. Tragic happens, as I was running up the stairs, I tripped and fell. Cutted my 4 toes, abrasion on my right elbow and hip and there is a swollen bruise under my left knew. Reach office and thought that everytime was over.NO ITs NOT!!!
Got news that I need to repeat some of the test I done on weekend (sian no lunch), then my boss ask me to go MOM. Best, I was so blur there don know which counter to go, and my HP NO BATT cannot call. Call my boss after i got to a public phone. finally everything settle. Hit my hip again when I was about to board the cab. After I got back to office got to know someone repeat the test for me... GD, but just receive a bad news, the certificate I got might have error... SHIT... I don want anymore trouble and injuries...
Hap | 9/24/2007 01:13:00 PM
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Hap's Post
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Read some of the past entries, it make me missed my poly life even more, NPtkd, the fwens there and my ploy classmates. Those entries motivated me, I must continue my 'Xiao Qiang's spirit'. I will continue to endure. I had long forgotton Xiao Qiang spirit. I think why some of the people continue to go back NPtkd even after graduation is to keep the memories and to continue having it. Being fwens with students is the best, there are not as vicious and cunning as collagues and cutter also. Tought of going back to NPtkd, but may be when I am free bah.. NPtkd helped me to loss weight once, I need that again...
Guess I have to contact my fwens and plan for gatherings, really miss them from sec sch mate to poly class mates... I miss all of u...
Hap | 9/19/2007 04:45:00 PM
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Hap's Post
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Whats going on in my life? Nothing seems to be right.
Went to for class yesterday, found out that majority of the project done on sunday was wrong. So we decided to dicuss about it online after class. I stayed up till 3am. So tired. very very tired.
I am physically and mentally drained. I don't want to play mind game. I want a bed and two days of leave. I just want to slack at home and sleep as much as I can, if this continue my healthy sure got problem. I want to sleep... sleep...
Hap | 9/18/2007 11:33:00 AM
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Hap's Post
Monday, September 17, 2007
Had been sleeping at around 12am and wake up at 6 am from last Monday to Wednesday, this got worst from Thursday onwards. Hope to go tkd on weekends, I went to bed only at 1am, woke up at 6am for work.
Friday, went tkd after work. Hehe do aerobics, remember the time Darling taught BS and me taekwon aerobics. I remember the steps fast, but no sense of rhythm, BS was opp. After class, went for dinner before going home. Went to bed at 12am then woke up at 6am the next day to work OT.
Worked OT for 6 hours (I am happy that I can work OT, more money mah).I am damn tired. Over slept on my way home. Got home, have some food then go tkd. There was a celebration for Yu Wei's bday. Went out for supper after yew tee class.
Bianca, Angel, Jeremy, Jerome, S Pi , XL and my sis was there. I was a little piss off with someone. May be kids nowadays is really different from my times. I still recall how my mum stop me from going out, calling me on my hp to remind me that it was time to go home when I was with the tkd people at the coffee shop opposite my house. Anyway, was surprise by what the kids were doing, so different from my times.
Then someone told her parent that she was with me , (OH Shit, what if the mother come look for me?). After meal it was like 1am le, we were thinking of where to go, don't know who told the kids that I need to go home early. The 'Someone' who mention my name to her mum, said 'Its ALL ur (me) fault lah, u should have told me that we are going back so early mah! The I don't have to call my mum" Please leh, I was very quiet at that time , saying I am okie with going to anywhere. I was so angry with the disrespectful attitudeshe gave me. Yes, to some ppl I am petty. Then take it that I am!
It was already 2am when I reached home, chatted for an hour with my mum . It means I went to bed at 3am, woke up at 7 am prepare for the project discussion and head for bugis national library.
After the project discussion, went for tkd. Saw 'someone' but I am no longer angry le . hehe quite happy that at least I am no longer scare to spar with the kids, I admit that I am useless, I fear sparring with the kids. Glad that I voice out that I want to spar and I got a chance. Got home after 12 am .
Got sch plus work today.I am so tired, too tired to do anything. My mind has been blank the whole day. Slack at work the whole day. I am in a state which my mind is blank and I don't know what to do. Tired really tired. Another thing on my mind is, I want to change job, I think its time to change. I would consider for a few more days and may be will set my mind to change... ...
Hap | 9/17/2007 04:01:00 PM
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Hap's Post
Thursday, September 13, 2007
I have lesser and lesser of free time. I am feeling more and more insecure, but people around me are getting less and less sensitive. I am a person whom needs lots and lots of care and concern. I am so uncertain of myself, of the things I do that I requires lots and lots of acknowledgement. But who knows that? Who can provide me with that? Whats the point of saying you will stand with me, will support me? Yet you don't understand what i am thinking. Told you that I need lots and lots of attention but u are showering me lesser and lesser. Its only the beginning, and you had become like this. Do you understand how I feel? Do you know what I need after i had voice out so many many times?
Hap | 9/13/2007 08:38:00 PM
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Alot of things had been on my mind today, after talking to my sister I become even more troubled. I am so useless as a big sister, I am feel so bad. I feel so inferior, I hate growing up, can I don't grow up.
I have been a person who is always regreting, so I told myself to follow my heart thinking that I will never regret. In the end i was wrong, very wrong. i ended up regreting. Finding excuses allowing myself to make mistakes, again and again, years after years I am still doing that. I never learnt my mistakes.
Things changes as you grow, things are not as simple, easy and lucky. I am no longer like before and I had to face failure, lots and lots of failure. Worst of all, I am making others to pay for my failure. I don't want that, I don want. Can I answer everything myself? Will I be able to handle that? Facing everything alone seems so scary, so fearful.
What will my future be like, can I change now? Is it too late? I am ruining my future with my own hands? I am hurting my parents with my behaviour. I am digging a hole for myself.
Digging, digging and digging.
Hap | 9/13/2007 01:13:00 AM
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Hap's Post
Monday, September 10, 2007
Spent my 18th month anniversary with Him... Happy that everything was smooth and we were both happy... Yesterday also marked the end of my freedom, school is starting today. Got to continue with my tired and stressful life once again...
Hap | 9/10/2007 07:49:00 AM
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Hap's Post
Tuesday, September 04, 2007
How can ayone be so irritating?
I am so irritated by the old man till I decided to be a mute. Hia...
Hap | 9/04/2007 11:14:00 AM
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I am still sick...
Work the whole day plus an hour of OT. Went out for dinner with my family, after 'He' decided to ignore me. Obviously I was not in a good mood, ate and chat very little. However the topic which my family was saying made me think alot.
How to support a family when the husband and wife are earning very little. The total income of the family was only $2 300 without CPF deduction. They got to support the expenses of the only child (not even 1 years old) with that money.
It makes me think of my future, I am earning more than half of their total income but money does not seems to be enough for me. Will I be able to give my kids good life, or average type of lifestyle which I was brought up in? Would my pay be able to reach $2 300, instead of achiving 2K only when my spouse's pay is added in?
Would I be too broke to pay for my kid's expenses? Not able to give them things that they want? Unable to bring them overseas (may be not every year but every two year)? Do I want to get married and face all these problems?
Marriage still seems very far to me, I cannot foresee myself settling down. Rushing home just to prepare dinner, weekends burnt by doing housework are definently a NO to me.
Feeling insecure, no confindence in the relationship is also another factor. Help!!! Who can help me???
Darling , you got to take care of yourself. Although i don think that u would continue to read my blog after I stop blogging for so long. You got to be careful on the road. It hurts me when u simply lose your temper. may be its because u are tired, not in good mood or another. But I will still feel the pain when not treated nicely... I hope everything will be smooth for u, so that u can have good mood to treat me better...
Hap | 9/04/2007 08:32:00 AM
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Hap's Post
Monday, September 03, 2007
Had not blog for a few days. had been busy working OT.
Fall sick le, should be cold bah. 3rd Bukit Purmei tounrament held last sat (1st Sep). Was busy, in fact I was in a delimna. Anything in the end I went there, as usual it was for my brother. Lots of things happen, but cannot elaborate here. One thing that i would like to share is " Well done my xiao di er er" I am so proud of him. His opponent was few cm taller than him. When I saw his opponent's first kick that score my brother, I thought my brother was going to lose. My brother proven me wrong. He gave that fellow 3 head kick. by the end of first round the score was 1 vs 6 for the tall guys and my brother respectively. In the end my before round two end, I brother won, 1vs 9. Haha I was so happy for xiao di er er. Hehe... may be others will say I am 'hao lian' but I am really happy for him. hehe Keep it up Xiao Di er er...
hehe cos it was my brother therefore I elaborate a little on his match. Others done well too, Aloysius, Angel, Ern Chi, Edwin, Johnson and others. Some are expected winners and they did not disspointed me like Bianca and Yi Mei.
Thats all for Satuday. Before I end for Saturday, I must thank a few people. 1. My darling, I am gald that he was there even despite the long distance that he got to travel. Thank You darling. 2. The boon lay guys especially Xiao Lang and SP, u guys assisted there so I have more time to look at the match , support the players and also spend a little more time with my darling...
As for sunday , I worked OT despite being sick. Went for lunch with darling. (I think because of thatr, he is sick now). Then went back home, rest before going dinner with my family.
Sad thing happen. That make me very sad, in fact felt hurted but no one knows.
I will keep mum about it...
As for now... One thing in my mind. I WANT TO GO CHINESE GARDEN, for the lantern fesival thingy , i never go before... I WANT TO GO!!!
Hap | 9/03/2007 08:07:00 AM
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