Hap!!!

2011-01-23T19:21:00.000+08:00

Its the 3rd Sunday... 2011-01-19 Meeting in the morning as usual. So fed up at work. First time on teleconference with big boss. He is so pushy, I am so stresss.... Meet up with YL and SF. YL brought her daughter along. Janelle is a cute little girl, very active. SF was a great nanny that day. I feel that I do not have enough time for my fwens, always not updated on their happenings. We had dinner at Soup Restaurant @ JP. http://www.souprestaurant.com.sg/promotion.html

2011-01-16T12:34:00.000+08:00

Its the 2nd Sunday of 2011.. 2011-01-16

2011-01-09
Went for my pop piano lesson. I did not know that I would be having evaluation on that day. I got to play "安静" and "Lovers' Concento". I did not do well for 安静, as usual it was not smooth. As for Lovers Concento, it was not as good as I thought I would play... :(
My piano teacher is changed, the new teacher is Joann. A young, pretty and cheerful girl. We will only receive our evaluation on 2011-01-16.
After lesson, I went to Mustafa with Bee. There is alot of ppl, I really don't like crowded place. :( After that we went to Banana Leaf. We had a hard time looking for that place, Bee determined to find that place, I wanted to give up... Damn hard to find the place. :((
We ordered Fish head curry, just that as there was only two of us. The food was nice, and I think it is not too expensive. $30 for fish head curry, 1 serving of bryani and 2 cup of lime juice.
The Banana Leaf Apolo (Race Course Road) - Singapore Food Reviews, Promotions and Information

2011-01-10
My boss will be away for the whole week as she is on course. No after-work program or OT. Finally get to see Didi in his overall. He is so poor thing, had school till 6++, reached home aroudn 6:30pm and he got to rush for training.

2011-01-11
Stay to work OT today. Busy busy with work...

2011-01-12
Meeting Qiao Hui today. We (Law, LM, Nestor, Ivy and husband, and Jack) all went out together. We went to Maxwell Food center. Ordered some local food, and we shared the food (Satay, Char Kuay Tiao., Hokkien Mee, Ngoh Hiang, and lots of other food)
After that, we went to Once Upon a Milk Shake. Took photos, chat, tried each other's ice cream and drinks. It was relaxing and fun. We arranged to meet on 2011-01-21 on the spot.
Maxwell Food Centre :: Asian :: Restaurants :: Time Out Singapore

2011-01-13
Stayed for OT today, nothing else.

2011-01-14
Meet up with BS and Joseph after work. We went to Vivio. Had dinner at "Thai Accent" follow by movie. Watch "鬼也笑", some of the parts are so scary. *怕怕* As it is a hormedy show, the comedy part was funny too.
Had Lime juice with Kamguat from 贡茶, it is a refreshing drink. Liked it. BS then suggest that we go Harry's @ Harbour Front Center. No alchololic drinks for me as I am still feeling unwell. Had Strawberry Colada, it is Strawberry ice blended...

BS asked wbout my 5 years plan, I realised that I do not have any plans. I have stopped setting targets for myself. This is not healthy. :(
Thai Accent (VivoCity) - Singapore Food Reviews, Promotions and Information
Harry's Bar

2011-01-15
Went back to work and then to see doc. My throat was very painful. :(

2011-01-09T11:35:00.008+08:00

2011 01 09

Today is the first sunday of the new year. :) For the past one week I had not been going out, its just work and home.

Finally collected my certificate on 2011 01 03, after which I went to Holland Village to have dinner with my sister. We had middle east food at Al Hamra, the ambience seems cosy but the place is abit warm, I think they had switched off the air con as there was no customer before us. We felt so lost inside the resturant because it is our first time there. We ordered Chicken Cous(chicken stew) and Jawaneh Dajaj (chicken wings). The food was alot and it is more that enought for the both of us. It costed us $63.56.

After dinner we went to Ikea, did some shopping there, we had a argument other than shopping. Hope that no one had film is nad post it on STOMP. Spent another $62.20 on hanger, tokid salad, containers and covers. Al Hamra Lebanese & Middle Eastern Cuisine (Holland Village) - Singapore Food Reviews, Promotions and Information

2011 01 04 was just work , OT and home. Did not go anywhere after work. I bought 2 tops and a belt for my self. I costed $90. Kept repeating the song 被动.

2011 01 05 Met up with my grandmother. She is in singapore so mum, dad and I had dinner with her, Bee did not join us because she is working. :( We had dinner at Sin Heng Claypot Bak Koot Teh. It was a raining day so Bak Koot Teh is perfert, hot sooup on a cold night... *thumbs up* Grandma asked me again do I have a bf?? Hia don't have, I also don't know where to find. :( So sian, CNY is round the coner, more people will be asking le. Sin Heng Claypot Bak Kut Teh - Singapore Food Reviews, Promotions and Information

2011 01 06 I was on MC. Sick le... I just stay at home. Managed to fix up the VCR to TV.

2011 01 07 Went back to work. Had dinner with Bee and ma ma near our place, went to buy a dress for CNY. So expensive loh $45... .

2011 01 08 I am so looking forward to this day, going out with GN, GNOW and Fiah today. I went to work in the morning, and meet they at JE. We were suppose to go for the CSI exhibiton but as we the girls were late so we cancelled the trip. (Science center closes at 6pm and we were still at JE when it is 5pm.) Science Center and Pompeii @ national museum closes at 6 pm and most of the games cafe would have been fully book so we went somewhere else. After meal at Blue Jaz, we went to the 3rd level of the place. The environment was very nice, with songs and cozy seats. GN and GNOW suggest that I try Pina Colado (light rum, coconut cream and pineapple). It is quite sweet so I liked it.. We change place to sofa test when we hae a chance. We start to play the card games, natuarlly with my limited vocabulary so I lost in the games. I tried desperate method to win but still lose. Hope that they don't find me a sore-loser. I left Blue Jaz with super duper red face. We went to watch free Belly Dance (Nabins), the girl was good and natural. But we The next place (Merdandy), is not so high class. The drink there sucks, the mint tea is so yucky; their cuppocino is like 3-in-1 coffee. Fiah left early. The rest of us chatted, talk crap had lots of photo-taking session. :)) Blu Jaz Cafe - Singapore Food Reviews, Promotions and Information

2011 01 09 after missed my pop piano lesson for 3 weeks, I am heading back. :( Hope I will not feel too left out. Heading to Mustafa after my lesson when Bee.

2011-01-02T11:22:00.003+08:00

2011-01-02

Its the 2nd day of the new year... I would like to do some re-cap of my New Year's Eve

2010-12-31 (08:30-17:00) - Working, it was quite slack cos the bosses are not around.

18:00-19:10 - Walking around Bugis looking for food with GN, finally settle for Vietnamese food.

Met GNOW after dinner and the 3 of us went for movie @ The Cathay "Gulliver's Travel". The beginning is abit abrupt, but it gets funny and interesting in the middle. The show do not have much of story line, but as a comedy it is successful... Like the part where the whole Liliput become like a modern city and Gulliver had make several movie his own life story (Titanic, Star Wars, Avatar), the part where he become a doll was great too... Nice movie to de-stress before 2010 end. It is a great new year count down with the right people...

I hope this would make a great start for the new year...

2010-12-26T09:30:00.007+08:00

Its almost the end of the year....

Brother participated in several tournaments
I did not go overseas this year.
Work load had increase this year
More and more friends getting married
Nothing exciting happened this year....

Time to reflect my resolutions...
Review for last year.
For 2010....
1. More saving... I think I did but I am also spending alot.
2. Buy a car by end of 2012 (Don't think can buy one any sooner) :( have to work towards this )
3. Go back tkd I tried but too busy with work..
4. Exercise more.... Keep trying
5. Be more "on" I did... At least I feel that I did....

New Resolutions
1. Spend lesser... (max: 500/month)
2. Have more time for family... (Every Sat shall be my family day)
3. Must be less "Sua Gu" (Must chio friends out more often)
4. Plan to go oversease (Must look for Kaki and plan locations)
5. Hope I will have a great year...

2009-12-31T09:16:00.003+08:00

Today is the last day of 2009, its time to do some re-cap:

1. Went to Taiwan with BS, Joseph, Angie, Lydia and Melvin (Had enjoyed it)
2. Went Batam with my colleagues (joyce song, RC, Jack, Sino, ZJ and amanda)
3. Got my driving licence
4. Went drinking with my colleagues
5. Went cycling with colleagues

I believed I have accomplished most of the resolution I set for myself:

1. Passed my Driving test the 1st time - I got my license, but not the 1st time though
2. More savings - $650/ mth - Did not
3. Buy a car by end of 2010 - Still working towards it..
4. Go pubbing - Looking forward to it...
5. Go back tkd - Maybe

For 2010....

1. More saving...
2. Buy a car by end of 2012 (Don't think can buy one any sooner) :(
3. Go back tkd
4. Exercise more....
5. Be more "on"

Most impt: Be prettier...

不顺利的一个早上

2009-09-13T12:38:00.000+08:00

泡泡破了。有点失望。需要emo 一下。

为什么今天什么都不顺利？

2009-09-13T01:18:00.002+08:00

I am so happy, happy to be in contact with him... SO happy!! Hia, too unprofessional...

Back from "JUMP" totally enjoyed it... Its a wonderful play... :)

Also had bonding session with my bro... Spent my day with him. Happy happy...

2009-09-07T11:08:00.002+08:00

I am glad that he replied. Finally replied. It might be my wishful thinking but I only hope to have another friend, nothing else… =)

Had been sick for the whole week, first was blocked nose and now cough, Had been a good girl to finish my medication but no improvement yet.

Need to do my dissertation soon, afraid that I do not have enough time for that feared that my command of English CMI… Where to find help???

My plans for this week:

07 Sep 2009 – suppose to meet colleagues for dinner, but cancelled to do revision and to search for articles.

08 Sep 2009 – lesson

09 Sep 2009 – Movie – The time traveler’s wife (with Law, small gal and Boy Boy)

10 Sep 2009 – lesson

12 Sep 2009 – Jump

2009-09-01T23:36:00.000+08:00

Just got home after watching "The Proposal" with Law and LM... Ryan Reynolds is cute... The show is a romance comedy. The laughter starts from the beginning right to the end of the show.

What is important for two people to be together? In the show, the lead actors fell in love with each other after spending 3 days together. Is it the common interest that they have, the quality time that they spend together, their looks? I really wonders.

In life there is alot of coincidence, we have to be at the same place at the same time. Being at the same place is not enough, people got to make an effort to talk and get the know each other. It is like everything is fated in life. But if everything is fated, why are is it that everyone is having different life... why so I feel that my life is different? We are fated to certain things and the fated is affected by the choices we make in life?

2009-08-31T20:07:00.000+08:00

I think I am missing someone... I think I am spending too much time online... I realised that I should not be spending most of my time online... I should be more active, I side-tracked too much... I know what time of person I want to be, I should have worked towards it. Someone make me realised that I should continue to achieve what I want. I should try different type of things...

2009-08-24T23:28:00.000+08:00

I think I am over friendly...

There is a person coming to my company to teach us how to us a equipment... He is a ABT (american born taiwanese), he looked professional. I saw him last thursday. Until today then I know that he is a year young than me, can be quite fun too...

Since today is his last day in sg, few colleagues and I brought him out. We went to Sg flyers then had dinner at ABC...

2009-08-06T14:01:00.006+08:00

Can I have more money or be less playful??

Finish one exam yesterday, and I had programs all lined up from today till sunday. And will have to study for the next paper again...

Yesterday (05 Aug 09) - Met up with YL for lunch after my paper. Finally have sometime to catch up with my fwens...

Today (06 Aug 09) - Go K with YiL, Song, and Ah Kum after work.

07 Aug 09 - Watch "UP" with Law and LM, hope I will not be light bulb..

08 Aug 09 - Shld be working in the morning, Go Blading with BS, and some tkd family in the evening.

09 Aug 09 - Shld be working in the morning, watching "G.I. Joe" with ZJ and Ah Chang in the afternoon , follow by dinner with YiL, Ah Kum, Song, ZJ, Ah Chang, Nath and partner, Jie Ke and WY and Holland V.

Planned to stop all activity and concentrate on books on 10 Aug 09...

2009-08-02T15:33:00.000+08:00

Sad Sad... I am 25 le... But the good thing is I don't think I am old...:)

I realise that there is a few occassion that is important to me: Chinese New Year; My birthday and christmas. But sadly, I have exam on 9th and 19th Aug. Hia, need to study for exam so cannot celebrate.

2009-07-21T17:08:00.002+08:00

我觉得自己很虚伪。我讨厌虚伪的我。身边的人好像不是在利用我虚伪的一面，直到我不会发飘而不顾虑我的感受。然而，也有一些人利用我的情绪，利用我那无法忍受的不爽而贬低我。

或许我害怕被取代、害怕不被重视又或者是自卑心在作祟，对人与人之间的相处是有爱有恨。我讨厌身边那些表面上对我不错的人，有些真的无法让我觉得他们是好人。

曾经有人说过因为我把每个人都想的很完美，很善良。所以在他们展现出人类不完美的一面时，我会很失望。失落的我在感到无助时会选择逃辟，封闭自己。

2009-07-21T14:32:00.003+08:00

Had been very emo for last week and this week.

Had my presentation last week, don't think it went well for my part. Although my lectureres had commented that I did well for a part but I don't know lah...

15 Jul 2009

Went to Sakura with some colleagues including my boss. Two of my colleagues are leaving, one for further studies the other for new job. Other then eating we also took some pictures.

17 Jul 2009

Went to Pizza @ PS with some colleagues, it was a farewell but with different group of people. Met a blind person when I was going home. Stayed with him but I left before his bus was here. Singaporean are generally helpful, I left the guy cos I see that there are other people helping him...

The rest of the week is just work and slack. At first I wanted to work seriously, i do not want to be too close to any colleagues, I wanted to stay neutral. However as days passed by, I become emo. Closed up, do not want to talk to anyone. This is bad...

This week

I had wanted to do my best at work again. But the NA at my work place totally turn me off... I am so pissed of with him and don like my boss to treat me this way. Hate it... I did sometime really childish. I hate the NA. Asked me stuff when my boss is not ard, when my boss is around, he don ask me.. ACT like I am not approachable loh. NA, go back to your NA country lah.

You better don't ask me anything, I will just say I DON KNOW.

为什么有些人可以很快乐？

要快乐，要先知道自己要什么

如果连这个都不懂，

盲目的努力但总不能另自己开心。

不能向目标前进，

不能替自己争取快乐。

2009-07-05T11:05:00.002+08:00

20 Jun 2009

Meet up with a poly fwen at JP. Watched "Drag Me to Hell" OMG, the show is so disgusting. The sticky stick type of saliva, almost make me puke... It was a hororr movie however there were some funny scene in it too... The movie itself was alright, but the students that I am watching with in the same cinema spoilt the show. Had people keep on talking or comment on the movie loudly. Hia...
After that had late lunch, walked ard for while then left. I went to YT for TKD. I am so lousy le... Did some kick and I feel like dying... But I am happy for the speed that i kick after slacking for so long... hehe (:X deciving mysef that I am not bad...)

23 Jun 2009

Met up with SF, YL and for the first time YL's hubby (ZY) joined us. Had dinner at "Tian Le Li" then watched Transformer. Loved the show, hehe, the animation and the accompany were both great. Seldom watch movie with my two gals... MEGAN FOX is so pretty and hot...

05 July 2009

Going to watch "Ice Age 3" with my colleagues later (RC, ZJ, Song, YL, Ah Kam, James, SC, Jack, Nath, My Bro and me) hope it will be nice...

Had been spending my time rushing my work and school work lately other than the outings. Feel lonely and sad sometimes. I had to feel left out, I don't understand why I always have that feeling. May be the problem lies with me... I am always with certain clique no matter where am I, but I always feel left out in the clique. HATE IT TO THE CORE... Somehow, I cannot stop myself from feeling that way...

I am always envy about others... never satisfy with what i have... AM I not having enough or am I asking for too much? I must change my thinking... This is always a part of me that is always bothering me and I never able to change.

Meteor Garden

2009-06-22T22:31:00.003+08:00

I first watch that show when i was waiting for Poly semester to start.

Loved the show to the max that I dare not watch other show for a month, I don't want to gorget the story line nor the cast.

After so many years, I am watching the show again. Love it... I loved Hua Zei Lei's out look and Dao Ming Si's character...

2009-06-09T10:00:00.002+08:00

05 June 2009

Had been working for 13 days in a row, feeling damn tired... I was half stoning when I was having dinner with my colleagues (Law, Nit, LM, Bee yan, Nestor, Ivy and her husband), did not join in their conversation as I was really tired. All I did was to stare and listen to them... Despite being tried, I did not waste money for the movie tickets. The movie (Monster vs Alien) was interesting and funny enough to keep me awake.

As it was Law's birthday on that day, we went for a drink after the movie. It had been a long time since I walk along Orchard Road at night. The whole group of us walked from Cineleisure to Taka, but coffee club was too pack therefore we head to Bakerzin @ Paragon. There was not enough seats for us and they close at 10:30pm therefore we got to change venue again. This time we decided to go IndoChine @ Wisma. But before that, LM and I went to Starbucks @ Borders to look for seats, but to no vaild. Finally the others told us there are seats at IndoChine. Its my first time there...

Ordered a drink called Honolulu, I think its Gin with orange juice and pineapple juice. I like the taste. Slack there for abt an hour before we all head home. I do not know is the drink or the bus that makes me feel like puking. Got to alight the bus before i reach home because I do not want to vomit on the bus. End up taking a cab home, luckily the distance was not very far... KO-ed once I reach home...

06 Jun 2009

My 14th day working.... I was very very tired... My initial plan was to work till 4:30-5pm then go for my lesson before meeting my colleagues but I cannot make it... I was very tired therefore went home earlier. My dad wanted to talk to me therefore I cannot sleep. Went for my lesson without resting. I was stoning again when I finally met up with my colleagues (Law -again, Jack, Joyce, ZJ and RC), but with this group of ppl I will not stone. had Steamboat at Xian De Lai @ Bugis the food was alright and the accompany was great... Had fun there. We met because of Law's birthday therefore bought him a cake. (Did I mentioned I also bought him a cake on 05 Jun 2009). I felt bad for buying a small chocolate cake for him twice.

Headed home after walking around Bugis for awhile.

No matter its Product and Development and QC (the group on 05 Jun) or Production (the group I met on 06 Jun) R&A (Law) and QA (Me) are needed. Therefore there was two celebrations for Law.

07 Jun 2009

Suppose to be my 15th working day, but I decided to go Ong Min Kian Cup... Although I was not the referee, I decided to be an unofficial camera woman. Woodlands tkd are participating in the tournament organised by ACME @ Tampines North CC.

The kids fought well especially the following - Bertha, Ern Rae, Shawn, Bianca, JJ, Nichelle, Nichole. Some of them are fighting with people whom won them before, some fought with people who looked stronger/ taller than them the others fought hard and endured whatever could have affected them. I really think these kids did well, train harder fighters, you guys are Fighters of WOODLANDS TKD.

I would also like to comment on the parents. The parents are so supportive not only to their children but to all Fighters of WOODLANDS TKD. Although they are not cheering for me, I feel touched when I see everyone of woodlands tkd cheering for colin, nichelle, nigel, shawn and the rest. Everyone was united at that moment? I lovedto see that... Haha...

Had a hard time typing the this out, I think my english CMI... Sian...

2009-06-03T14:25:00.001+08:00

had not blog for a while.

Busy with school work and work...

Spending more time with colleagues than anyone else. Feeling tired every single day. I want to sleep...

Studying about Cancer this term, freak out by the fact that food that we are eating are not safe. The animals with growth hormones, the plants with pesticides... Seems like nothing is safe! What have the world becoming? Advance in science resulting in the misuse of chemical and drugs which in-turn harming human?

2009-06-03T14:12:00.006+08:00

Did a personality quiz, Here is the link.

Your view on yourself: You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for: You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship: You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love: You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you: You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success: You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of: You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self: You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

2009-04-21T10:24:00.002+08:00

After few days of break, school starts again... Busy! BUsy! BUSY!!!

Hectic life starts again...

2009-04-20T16:53:00.003+08:00

My exam is over... Haha..

Friday after my exam, met RC, ZJ, Li Ching, Cindy and Joyce for movie at The Cathay. Watched "Fast and Furious 4", Vin Diseal may be old, but he is very charming... I did not watched Part 1-3, but part 4 was good, the car racing skills was fanastic... Once again, I showed my friendly side, talked to Li Ching and Cindy, act young with them... Haha, not much acting lah, I am young what. (Li Ching and Cindy are attachment student, and they are workign at the different dept therefore the rest of them are not very close to them..)

Had to work on saturaday, went for tkd @ Yew Tee. Oh my, the ground was super warm. Had a short training and went home feel lethargic.

Sunday, went to Kbox @ clementi with Joyce. I went there just to creat noise pollution as I am not the type that can sing, that poor girl got to endure my voice fro 4 hours... haha, after K, we went to meet RC and Nath for movie. Yea, movie again, this time is "Knowing". The small boy is so cute. The effects of the train clash and the destroy of the earth was good. Despite that the ending was abit abrupt, the show is worth watching. Start to feel that I am not treating people around me well enough, not good enough to not-to-regret how I am treating them if I am going to part with them soon...

2009-04-15T14:00:00.002+08:00

I feel so out of place...

It seems like there is no where that I can fit in. Is it my character or my personality? I am always neither here nor there.

I am the not so active person among active and fun loving people, yet not so inactive person among the quiet ones.
I cannot talk to girls about make up, yet cannot discuss with guys about IT or games.
I am too mature for kids, yet too childish for adults.
I am not excatly an introvert, neither am I an extrovert.
I am not excatly a naive person, nor a smart girl.
If all these are fated, then why am I fated to be such a person? If it is not fated, how come I cannot change this? No matter how hard I try, i seems to fit nowhere after sometime.

Can anyone enlighten me???

2009-04-13T00:46:00.002+08:00

Haha, had a great laugh just now.

Spent my long weekend studying, so many things to study... Had wonderful time with Yi Hong, Ernest and my brother at tkd on Sat and Sun... I got to see them when I went to bring my brother home. Haha, the jokers are so funny, if not for my brother , I might have generation gap with them.

Those laughter are really, uncontrollable laughter (not so lady-like) from my heart. Those laughter make me feel better and lesser my worries.

Saw Hui Min at sunday training, see more and more ppl going back, make me feel like joining them. But I got no courage and stamina to join them leh...

What if I get trash by the kids, who were once my students ? What if I cannot take even 10 % of the training?

PS: Junko can be really fierce if she wants to. Haha Cat fight is women's instinct....

I am so CHUIIIIIIII !!!!!

2009-04-04T22:22:00.002+08:00

I went to Yew Tee, for some tkd training. OMG, I am so so super lousy now.

Start from stretching, my center split is damn lousy now, although last time I also cannot stretch very much, but I am worse now.
Then did 140 kicks/ leg of different combinations. My partner, a small boy, commented that I look pale. Hia, my kicks got no strength, no accuracy even the moves seems weird to me.
Lastly for pattern, I forgot the patterns le, peek at others before i start doing... OMG, every thing I learn in tkd before seems to be gone...

I must start to do some light training le...

2009-04-01T23:42:00.002+08:00

Was looking at some old post, alot of memories flash back. The Orientation camp, people I know there; My class 1f09; My GL days; CCAs and my revision kakis.

I always know since poly, that i enjoyed my poly life. Now when I recall back, Poly life was the happiest. I was active and don have to care about money. Although since young, I don't dread going to school but I always looked forward to go poly for lesson and tkd training.

Recalled how I always meet BS ever since I got to know her and go tkd together. We were once training partner, but now she is so good and I am so lousy. We always have laughter around us, even during tough tough trainings. In tkd, I can only click with people who are younger than me, Ben, Ben Ben, Kenneth, Terence and BS. So sad now to realised that I am only still in contact with BS but we are not so close le... ...

As for academic, GARY ANG, Nat, Candy and Smart uncle - Sumarlin... We always study till quite late in school. Sumarlin is always willing to teach and will say no matter how late, if got qn can just call him... Gary is the entertainment king loh, always feel destressed when is starts crapping.... Haha...

Why had I let these people leave my life? My life is never the same w/o them... I feel that I made a wrong decision to get into relationship few years back. If I had not gone into relationship, I might still be in contact with them. Its hard now to correct the mistakes I make years ago. I have wasted 3 years of my prime time... How to correct eveything?

2009-03-31T10:39:00.002+08:00

Irritating fellow, you think you very big shot ar. PLEASE REMEMBER THAT YOU ARE NOT MY BOSS LOH, Old colleague only hor. You are not the only one who is busy lah, question me this, question me that... back to your style (stabbing people), yea the boss like you now then? Order me to do this and that.

MY BOSS DON'T LIKE ME BAH...

2009-03-30T23:02:00.005+08:00

My weekends were burnt for Chin Khee Shin Cup. I was the helper and referee.

More than than 6 months since I last been referee, and with insufficient in tkd training I was not confident in being referee at all.

Matches on Sat was okie, because all kids and the eldest would only be 17 so not many tall people. Refereeing, was alright. Not too hard. But sunday was a nightmare, luckly it was a short one. When I was the center referee I keeping looking at who are the next fighters, if they are experience or tall then I would ask for a change. Until once, I referee for a friend who is very tall, after that my confidence for refereeing matches were gain.

I think for now, other than heavy weight, I dare to referee for any matches.

Other than experience for being referee I get to see many people. The kids are so cute, some are so small yet they are potential fighters, I even have a boy whom I warned him that no pushing is allowed in his 2nd round. In the thrid round before the match starts (I will remind kids what their previous mistake were because I think the kids are not that experience to know all the fouls) "Cannot kick head hor","Cannot kick leg okie", then the boy asked "No, pushing??". Wa the small boy is so cute when he asked that.

As for the adults, can see that some fighters are very zai, some qutie chui de...

Also get to see some old tkd ppl whom I know previously or met in NPTkd, I am glad to see them again. Even though many times I am bullied but I am glad to see them.

As always watching these matches makes me want to train again and take part in tournament, but I never put them in real action so far... ...

p/s: Really cannot believe in this civilised century, there are people who would take stranger's belonging to use w/o asking. Do you know the meaning of personalisaed or ownership of belongings? If a kid would know they are not allow to do it, then why wouldn't an adult know what not to do? Yes, I am making a moutain out of a molehole.

2009-03-22T14:47:00.002+08:00

I AM BORED....

Study, study, study.... Cannot take it le... Life with work and study only is so boring...

I am becoming to be a boring person... Can I be more lively and exciting???

2009-02-01T10:01:00.003+08:00

Happy Chinese New Year Everyone!!!

23 Jan 2009 Still not CNY mood. Work as per usual.

24 Jan 2009 Busy spring cleaning my house, plan to go Grandparent's hse in the afternoon, but my house was too untidy that we only finish cleaning at 8pm... Had our dinner, before heading to JB... Must eat dinner first, cause scare later got jam. On the other hand, I was afraid that if go JB too late, later not very safe. My family got five member, therefore got to split cab, scare at night JB not safe. Luckly, there was no jam, smooth traffic all the way...The new malaysia custom is quite big and nicely built, the only disadvantage this the design of the enterance and exit. Got to walk quite a long way. Finally reached my grandparents' house at ard 11 pm... Chatted awhile with my grandparents, unpack out things, bath and sleep...

25 Jan 2009 My youngest uncle was instructed to bring us out for shopping, he seems pretty sian, but got no choice. In the evening my 2nd uncle came, he cooked dinner with my mum... This is the first time after many years that I am having my renunion dinner with my grandparents. although we are not having steamboat, but the dishes cooked we delicious... After dinner, people start the fireworks parade. 大家都在发烟花，到处都是烟花的声音，近距离看烟花果然不一样。烟花显得比较漂亮，好难得有爷爷和叔叔陪我一起看。

26 Jan 2009 Early in the morning is the firecracker parade. 早上8点钟起，鞭炮的声音就开始了。我算是备鞭炮声吵醒的吧！ Since its Chu Yi, so no shopping center to go... Slack around until my aunties and cousins arrive. We only meet once a year, therefore nothing much to say. it too us hours to break 'ice' and start chatting and jking around.

27 Jan 2009 Head back to Sg... Smooth traffic again... and my CNY mood ended then...

2009-01-22T10:23:00.002+08:00

It has been more than 2 weeks since I last blogged. Nothing much happen lately, not much outings with colleagues except going to Rocky's pizza and Daily scoop. Pizza and ice cream were nice, had casual chats then go home...

The rest of the time were mainly work and slacking at home.

Start going back to tkd, had injuried my right wrist, left in step and left ankle after sparring with cecillia. One week had passed, but my left ankle still pain at times. To add on to my injury, I fell down this morning, think sprain my right ankle, but I can still walk so shld be muscle strain not sprain bah...

CNY is coming, but so far got no CNY mood loh, sian...

However I would like to take this chance to wish anyone (hopefully there is someone) who is reading my blog:

新年快乐

心想事成

万事如意

钱.. 钱多多

2009-01-05T22:40:00.005+08:00

Found some interesting picture when I was surfing the net.

2009-01-05T13:22:00.004+08:00

Had been meeting my friends for the past few years of 2009: 363 TKD clique on 1 Jan 2009; partial Sec Sch fwens and Poly 1f09 Classmates on 3 Jan 2009 and TKD fwens on 4 Jan 2009 again.

1 Jan 2009
Went roller blading @ ECP with Yu Wei, Hui Min, Bee Siang, Gladwin, Joseph, Wei Lang, Jeremy and my brother. I was more confident this time round, after blading with some of the NP tkd ppl on 14 Dec 08.
Tried to pull my brother as I was blading, its damn difficult for me, with him, my blading speed is slower than walking speed. But there were a few strong people among our group, Jeremy, Wei lang and my bro is able to do the caterpillar thing (4 people at the back). To me, they are powerful loh... The other pro skater is Gladwin, he taught me theA turn (don't know the right term for the turn), tried to do T brake too, but I failed to master T brake.
There was few indcident that I had to blade down slope, I cannot stop myself, luckly Joseph and my bro were there, if not I sure fall more than two times. After that had dinner with BS, Joseph and my bro @ JP -Fig and Olive, shopped around then head for home.

3 Jan 2009
Had my driving lesson in the morning, meet Su Fong and Yi Ling to go Decorders Cafe. Had fun playing there, I was afraid that they would not like the place, but luckly with SF make the sound of gorilla make our stay there more lively. Played some games, relax ourselves. We were back to our sec sch times, crazy and loud...
After which we walked to Newton MRT . I had to meet 1fo9 people while SF accompany YL to do some shopping for baby stuff.
I reached Cityhall 15 mins before our meeting time, felt that I do not have any of my classmates hp no. so end up shopping around at citylink before I meet up wih them. It had been ages since we last met, "How are you? What are you doing now" are the most asked questions, I believed everyone would at least have reapeated what they are doing for at least 2 times that night.
Dinner was not very nice, had a couple of photo taking session there.
After that we went to a cafe. Continue our photo taking and chat about marathon. Wow, they want to join the Women's workout and Standard Chartered run.(I will join them if I trained.) After that, home sweet home at around 10:30pm (if I am not wrong)

4 Jan 2009
It was Gladwin's birthday, met up with Birthday boy, Bee Siang, Joseph and Yu Wei after work. Had dinner at waraku curry house, then a drink at highlanders before going to Chinatown.

2009-01-02T09:02:00.004+08:00

It has been so long since my last post, this is also the 1st post of the year. One more year has past, everything thing since to be over very fast.

Events that I remember for 2008
My grandmother passed away.
Pay raise
Took up driving lesson (manual)
Went Thailand with Yu Wei, Hui Min and Striker
Become single
Passed my advance theory
Become TKD referee (sparring)
Be the referee for my brother's match and announce him as the winner
Company shifted to Pioneer Place
Better relationship with colleagues
1st Mathoron - Great Eastern Womens' 10km
Took up Kayaking 1 star course
Many movies and few outings with colleagues
More interest in roller blading

Looking back at the resolution I set last year and what I have accomplished (in Purple)
Resolution for 2008
1. Get my driving license by 2009 latest. - my driving test is on 20 Feb 2009 (consider as accomplished)
2. Save $ 300/ month. - saving $500/month as sch fees (consider as accomplished)
3. Go to taiwan / Thailand / China by the end of 2008. - Went thailand, going to taiwan in Mar 2009 (Accomplished)
4. Go pubbing - No chance to go, shall remain as my resolution
5. Be more active - participated in mathron, got my kayaking 1 star (Accomplished)
6. Must not argue with xx so much. - Does not matter now, since I am single :)

As for 2009 my resolutions are:
1. Passed my Driving test the 1st time
2. More savings - $650/ mth
3. Buy a car by end of 2010
4. Go pubbing
5. Go back tkd
6. Do not defer my studies and get my degree in 2010

2008-09-08T10:53:00.004+08:00

A post that I had wanted to post on Sunday... "I am immature, I am childish, I am petty, I am picky, I am crazy, I am all the bad things... ...

Can I not grow up? Can I not be 24? From young, I hate to be the eldest child of my family. Why am I always the one whom is not loved, not cared be it at home or with fwens?

Thought being nice to others, people will like me... But when I give in, I am not respected, I am being taken advantage of and when I don't, I am being unreasonable, being immature, being petty.

I am tired of trying to be nice to eveyone, I am not nice and I will never be... ... Cared too much for people whom always hurt me. Treat people the way you want them to treat you??? Bullshit!!! Others will never treat you the same...

I will only treat myself the way I had wanted people to treat me and treat others the way they treated me.

-No entry to my heart-

-Everything please get out of my heart-"

After reading some of the other people's blog, I also think about my 'home'. I share the same feelings for the part on 'home'. I never go tkd training, so not much comment on that. As for Fwens, ever since I start working I don have much time for them le... Relationship with my fwens are drifting apart and I am not making new friends... Envy those who are still in contact with fwens or who are continuing to make more fwens...

Remembered that at the beginning of this year, BS commented that I am a bi , neither a true introvert nor a extrovert. Now I see more and more introvert behaviour in me... I have no confident in everything I do, no confident in myself. No confident to talk to others sometimes this include my family.

Talking about my family, even now I can feel that they are bias, at first only my mum gave me that feeling and after so many years, my dad start to portrait his unfairness.

I may not be a young girl now, but I still need their care, I also longed to be pampered once in a while. I don't mind caring for my bro expecially since I am so much older than him, but who cares for me then? I am not independent, I don want to be and will never be... But who is there for me to depend???

To the girls who wrote about their home:

Parents would some times make us/you felt that they are not loving, but think back, that does not happen everyday. In your memories, they are times that your parents are nice to you, times where you can feel your parents love for you.
Put the unbalanced feeling aside, don't you think that your siblings are indeed young than you and they need more attention than you?
You may be upset when you get scolded or accuse of bullying you siblings, but after all the bad feeling subside your siblings will always be your siblings. Your family will still be your family.
You people are still young, but I can tell you this: the time that you can spend with your family like the way you have now, is getting lesser.
From personal experience, once you graduate from secondary school, you don't have much time with you family and once you start working you house might just be a hotel. Sometimes you might only get to see some family member once or twice /week due to different committment that your family member and you might have.

2008-08-13T17:57:00.000+08:00

Feeling low lately, don't feel like talking to anyone... ...

2008-08-12T16:32:00.002+08:00

I don't know what wrong with me, no confident in everything i do. Its so hard to concentrate today, why can't I study as hard as I was able to in poly? I need to do better now, I must... Must go back to my books...

You can listen to my problemssss???

2008-08-11T21:07:00.002+08:00

So stress today, tired... Must find some activities to de-stress... ... Hia, must relax more... ... I want to bully my brother, my way of de-stressing before I can find a better method... ...

2008-08-10T23:06:00.012+08:00

Malaysia Friendly match...

Group Picture of Team 363 before the match

Don't mess around with them...

Where is Bertha's head???

All prepared... Bring it on...

Mei Nus of Team 363

Hungry after the match...

2008-08-10T22:41:00.002+08:00

Spent my national day, revise my work in a slack manner...

Had dinner at my auntie's place then Watch 'Money Not Enough 2' mid night show.

10 years ago when 'MNE 1' was screen, I was only 14 so never watch part 1. Personally, I like Jack Neo's movie as they are so local, the jokes and ideas used in his movie are so Singapore based, as a Singaporean I am able to relate what the message that he is trying to get across...

Money Not Enough 2 is not just a comedy, it is also educating. Other than the jokes, I loved the part on kinship. The relationship between daughter - in -law and mother - in - law, the way parents are treated when they are old and sick, the choice that wold be made when we have to choose between children and parents. Watching the movie, really wake me up, reflecting the way I am treating my mother. Although I did not send her to old folks home, my parents are healthy, I felt that I should have treated they better, much better than what I am doing now...

Back to Money Not Enough 2, I strongly recommend people to get the DVD to watch or catch it on TV, if paying 7 dollars to too much... Its a movie that is suitable for everyone in the family, unless there is pessimistic or sensitive elderly at home...

2008-08-08T07:59:00.002+08:00

Nothing much to blog lately, other than stressful work and mine slack way of revising for my exams, nothing much happen... Audit was quite okie, got 1 MNC and 1 REC for my side... Why only me, get audit... The people who are around my age are not audited... My post, pay and qualification may be not there yet, but I certainly learnt alot in this audit...

Towards my demanding, picky boss, I have to thinking positive, I must learn to be more effective, careful when working under him... Hope one of this days when I finally get my certificate, my boss can also promote me... The old Joice, is useless, careless and immature... The future Joice, would be capable, pretty and smart... (My aim!!!)

My god-sister who is 12 years older than me is going overseas again, this time she is going Australia for holiday. She always give me an impression that she is capable, smart and in fact I hope to be like her... She is a manager, own a car, can afford everything that she need... So what if she got no bf, she do not need one...

12 Years later, would I be as capable as her? What must I do to make myself more capable??? How???

Imagine 12 years later if I am still in contact with the Team 363 fighters, and I am a capable, smart, pretty girl in their eyes.... Wahaha... (Its hard to be successful to an adult, but it is easiler to appear successful to kids...)

To continue dreaming... ... ...

2008-07-29T07:58:00.003+08:00

Tomorrow the audit start, I will be audited on the 2nd and 3rd day... I ma really not looking forward to it... Loss control of my temper yesterday, but its all okie le... I am so stress with my work till I lose the interest of working.

I must admit that I am only working for money.

As I feel so stress, I need to de-stress... Watched "The Dark Knight" last night, I like the actions, the was the scenes which requires perfect timing worked out, the plans that the Joker have was brilliant at times. The look of Harvey Dent (Aaron Eckhart) after boom-ed was well done too... The show was really not bad...

2008-07-24T08:46:00.004+08:00

It has been more than 3 month since I last blogged. Sorry, the continuation of the previous blog have to put on hold first.

I am single now, busy with work and studies. My boss came back from long MC, he is now super demanding, this boss is the most pushing boss I have through out my 3 years plus working in the company.

My exam is in 15 Aug and 24 sep... If not for money, I would have choose to stop working... I am so tired...

2008-04-21T13:12:00.003+08:00

17 Apr 2008 (1st day) Too excited that I am going to BKK that I cannot sleep. Woke up every 1 hour to check the time. Had arranged to meet Striker, Yu Wei and Hui min at 9am. All of them was on time, they had their breakfast at the coffee shop near my hse before we head for the airport. Our flight is at 1330, had arrived Thailand at around 3 plus(GMT +07:00).

Meet the person (PING) who is arranged to bring us to the hotel. He recommened Mambo show and Tiger show. We headed for the hotel after decided to watch the Mambo show which starts at 8:30 pm. In the mean time, we went to back to the hotel, left our bags and headed for MBK for money exchange. Walked to MBK, looked around but did not buy anything. We rush back to the hotel as there is not much time left. All the Drag queen were so pretty, except one who is plump but the entertainment he gave us were no less than those pretty drag queen. All were so pretty, we need to pay for taking pictures with them. Of course, Striker and I chose the prettiest one... The driver whom had drove us from the hotel to the show had recommended Tiger show, so for experience sake, we went.... Oh my god, Tiger show so not have tiger loh... R21 show... The girls there can do alot of this with their 'groin'. They can: put ping pong ball (at least more than 5); blades connected with strings; ribbons; shoot banana; ribbons with bells; water (and dispense out); blow candles and open this old type of soft drink glass can... We headed to Sum Luam Night Bazzar after the show, it was already 11:30pm, most of the shops were closing. I only manage to buy a 'Tuk Tuk' made of cans for my brother. After shopping, we went back to the hotel.

18 Apr 2008 (2nd Day) Had arranged to meet the rest at 8am. We went for breakfast that is provided by the hotel. The food was normal. After which, we walked (OMG WALK!!!) to the Pratumun Market. It was a long walk, the weather was very hot. Sweating like I had just bath. Hia.... I was very tired, too tired to shop at first. But after a while my shopping spree begins. After we put the things in the hotel, we went to Chinatown, the next stop. We took 'Tuk Tuk' there. It was raining when we reached. So we headed for out lunch at one of the chinese restraurant.

[To be continued]

2008-04-07T13:03:00.004+08:00

I seems to have forgotten about this blog again....

During this period, things that I remember are:

1) 7 Apr 2008 Went to Shokudu, with Gary. The food there are not very nice, I only liked the pizza, tofu cheese cake and the yuzu drink.

2) 8 Apr 2008, went to cathay cineplex (the one beside PS) with Striker, We watched Three kingdom. I am not familiar with the story thus I was lost for a few parts. The movie was not fantastic. After movie, we shopped awhile at the cineplex then when to PS to find food. Most of the shops were closing, end up trying QQ rice. I had try that at Novena before(it was nice), however the one at PS was not not nice, wrong filling given and the staff are not attentive... DON LIKE THAT....

3) Had my 5th Driving lesson on 15 Apr 2008. The instructor was 2 mins late. Drove to a car park, and start to learn U-turn. While doing one of the turn, I nearly bang into one of the large vehicle, but brake in time. After confirmed that I can do the U- turn , I was allowed to try it once on the road, did it successfully. Yeah!!!

4) Went to Bangkok on 17 - 20 Apr 2008

2008-04-03T11:42:00.005+08:00

4th Drving lesson 01 Apr 2008, 6pm.

Learnt how to turn left and right. Overall okie, not too bad. But of course, made some silly mistake again.

1) Wait for pedestrian from the wrong side to cross, I wanted to turn left. I was waiting for A to cross, waited, and she don't want to cross I decided to move the car. When i accelerate the car, people are point B start to cross, I cannot stop in time and nearly hit them. When I recall about this incident, I realise that people at A could not cross as it is not their turn to cross. Hia, focus at the wrong person.

2) When I was tailing the car in front which stop behind the zebra crossing, i nearly bang into the car. When I accelerate, I cannot stop in time. So instead of covering the small space between the car in front and mine, I nearly bang into it... Another lucky moment, my car stopped close, but never hit the car in front.

3) I estimated that the time me to continue driving is enough for the pedestrian to walk halfway through the zebra crossing. So I continue, when I was driving through the zebra crossing, the pedestrian was beside my car. My instructor then infrom me that it was not allowed... Hia... Why am I making silly mistake??? must blog down and remember it. Cannot make the same mistake again.

Other than that, no more mistake...

Had not meet up with my boyfriend since Sunday till now. Missed him, but cannot tell him that I want to see him, cannot force him to meet me too... ... Must let him meet me willingly... ... Are we drifting apart???

2nd and 3rd driving lesson

2008-04-01T07:58:00.003+08:00

My 2nd driving lesson was on 22 Mar 2008, 9am .

My first time driving on the road. So excited, and of course I panicked. When off slowly, very slowly. As I still cannot multi-tasked on the road , got to know the speed of my car, change gear, make sure my car is moving straight, end up, my instructor have to inform me when it is time to change gear and control the steering wheel for me when I am changing gear. (I am so disappointed with my myself, why so nervous??) But one thing that I am happy is , I never '死车' during the first 45 mins of driving.

But after 45 mins, I 屁股癢decided to adjust my leg as the position of it on the clutch was not comfortable. Haha, my car 'died' the min I raise up my feet while I was waiting for the traffic lights to turn green. My instructor was surprise with my stupid act"你在做什么??? 为什么放 clutch??" I was dumbfound, don't know what got over me, all I want was to adjusted my feet. After the first time of '死车' my car 'died' more than 3 times within 5 mins. Hia...

I only let go of the clutch once, the rest of the time is because, I cannot stop the car properly, I choose to slow down only when I am near the traffic lights, but it was too late. Nearly bang into the car before me, thus I panic again. i mixed up the brake, accelerator and clutch. I think if my instructor have no control over the brake, his car would be gone...

Finally, lesson end... The instructor, his car and I are all in good shape...

3rd lesson on 27 Mar 2008, 8pm. This slot was last min confirm de, so not mentally prepared.

I took a different route today, there is alot of turning, I often never turn enough. This lesson was worst than the previously one. In this lesson, I cannot turn, cannot stop properly. And the best part is, when the instructor is nagging, not to accelerate too much, my feet stepped on the accelerator harder.But, I really not doing that on purpose. There is a lot of car at that time, seeing cars around me, over taking me, make me panic. (I think my heart muscle are strengthen as it gets to pump more during my driving lesson. ) This lesson I learnt how to start a car, when it is stopped at up slope position. I did that well, just that the hand brake was not pulled to the right position when I have to stop the car.

Other than driving lesson, I am busy with work. Other than my routine QA/RA stuff, I need to help out in production and weekend OTs at QC. I like doing all these. Hehe... Must learn more, earn more.

2008-04-01T07:27:00.001+08:00

李宜薇

感情分析

*在男生群中很吃得開，常常是爭相追求的對象*對於才華洋溢或工作專業能力強的男孩子特別欣賞感情磁場上很容易遇到有錢的對象，有機會嫁入豪門*在感情未穩定前不可輕易結婚，否則很容易變心*對感情不會太執著，也很看得開，所以波折也比較少

內在想法

*腦筋比較保守死板，不容易變通*外表溫訓文靜的樣子，但是外柔內剛型*講求道理，對就是對、不對就是不對，不能容忍放水*不喜歡冒險，喜歡安定有保障的生活*吃軟不吃硬，只要對方態度放軟就會跟著心軟

外在行為

*個性穩定、行事作風保守的人*有時候會太堅守原則，讓人覺得很難溝通*重視家人，常常會以家人的意見為中心*有恒心毅力，不會半途而廢*個性較直來直往，很容易被看穿心事

1st Driving Lesson

2008-03-15T07:28:00.003+08:00

Finally got to courage to take up driving.

My first lesson was on 13 Mar 2008 6-7pm, It was raining heavily. Reached the place 45 mins eariler, did some last min reading of the advance theory book before my lesson. So nervous, its the first time I am going to drive a car.

My instructor finally reached and drove me to a multi storey car park. After some registration and thoery, half an hour an gone. So sad, only half an hour left. All I did for the remaining 30 mins was, learn how to change gear (w/o looking) , accelerate steadily (I am bad at this), let the car move slowly infront and lastly stop the car while its moving.

Oh Man, the braking part make me feel so stupid loh. When the instructor say' ok, now stop ur car'. I stopped it IMMEDIATELY!!! My instructor's comment was, you braked very hard hor. Come to think of it now, the car was moving very very slowly there is no need for me to zham the brake at that point of time.

after all this, its the end of my lesson...

Looking forward to next lesson...

2008-01-28T16:35:00.001+08:00

My grandmother had passed away...

Not much of my friend went to the wake. I thought I would not cry, but the sight of the coffin being carried away, elders crying and the music played soured my heart and tears fall uncontrollably.

2008-01-09T13:52:00.000+08:00

Hey people,

Valentine's day is coming... I would like to recommend this shop " Cupid Love". It is situated in Bugis Junction Level 2. This shop sells couple wear, keychains for couples, towels and etc... Tghey also have their own blog at http://www.cupidlove20.blogspot.com/.

2008-01-09T08:31:00.000+08:00

Got a bad news early in the morning...

My friend's father past away. Second death news this year. The first one was that MC King passed away. Although I am no friend or fan of MC king, the news that he is died make me realise that life is so fragile. There was no news that he is sick, as an actor if he is not feeling well or suffer from any major illness it would be reported. A healthy looking person can just pass away like this, without showing any signs. How sudden can it be...

In fact, this period from 2007 Christmas eve till now does not seems to be a good period. Two of my friends lost their father, one on 2007 Christmas eve the other on today. My friends are around my age, the lost of their parents make me upset. Upset that they lost a parents, it also make me worried that I would lose my... I had not been a filial or obedient daughter since young. My parents are continuously worried about me.

I must show my parents how much I loved them, cared about them and I cannot be without them...

2008-01-07T11:33:00.001+08:00

The people around me are getting more truthful...

2008-01-02T07:41:00.000+08:00

First Blog for Year 2008

Met up with my Secondary School Mates : Chin, Chong, YL, ZG & gf, Wee Koon and Bernard.

Luckly got WK there, that joker, said a lot of funny stuff and created a lot of jokes... However as they had something on, at around 8pm, I was the only one who stayed with YL at her house. Had a long chat with her before I left the place. Wanted to ensure that I still have bus back so I spent my last min of 2007 on the bus. It was nice to meet all of them, although abit left out but I am still glad that I met them. :)

2008 did not start nicely for me, I was really upset in the morning. Hope the rest of the year would be different (*sobs). Meet up with BS and Joseph at Stephen's place for mahjong. Haha I am still a noob ( need to clock enough hours to be promoted). I di not spend my first day of 2008 gambling as no money was involved. After Mahjong was Steam boat at Sunset way, did I mentioned that I had steamboat at YL's place on 31 Dec 2007. The place was okie, we were eating and chatting. The variety of food there was okie, not too bad... But its abit ex, $ 32.72 nett... Can only go there if its for gathering... Only after meal we start to chat about personality, BS concluded that I am a Bi~ after assesing as a friend for few years. Actually I agree that I am a Bi~. Its good to have this kind of chat once in a while...

I also set a few resolution for myself when I am at sunset way.

Resolution for 2008

1. Get my driving license by 2009 latest.
2. Save $ 300/ month.
3. Go to taiwan / Thailand / China by the end of 2008.
4. Go pubbing
5. Be more active
6. Must not argue with xx so much.

I will 'Jia You" to achieve these aims....

Lastly, Happy New Year everyone....

**bi~ half extrovert and half introvert

2007-12-10T08:07:00.000+08:00

Picture from www.flickr.com

Watched 'THE GOLDEN COMPASS' last friday with my Stephen and my brother. It was a nice show, or at least its nice to me... Looking forward to watch the 2nd part.

What I loved most about the movies:

1. The demons of the kids can change shape easily. The demons are like guarding angels and companion for the people.

2. The ride that Lyra had on the ice bear, its impossible in real live...

2. The fight between the two ice bears (polar bears), the screen which one of the ice bear's jaw drop was quite funny. The ice bear was shouting " Is that all?" with its mouth wide open, the next moment its jaw dropped. Timing is important... The other ice bear had chosen a good time to attack...

3. The last fight: the witches, the kids, the Gyptians , demons , the ice bear and Magisterium. Although it was abit messy but the fight sceen was not bloody.

The movie was a nice way to relax, after stressing by work and studies... There are still a few more movie that i would like to watch: Doremon, Enchanted, Good Luck Chuck, Mr Magorium's Wonder Emporium, Alvin The Chipmunks and lastly Alien Vs Predator 2. Don't think I will have chance to watch the first two movie in cinema , so got to wait for the DVD ...

2007-11-28T08:30:00.000+08:00

感觉上我和他好像疏远了。虽然在一起快两年了，但对他的感觉好像越来越陌生。不想要和他在一起只是应为习惯。看了‘天堂鸟’这部连续剧让我对我和他的将来感到害怕，我不是急着要嫁啦，只是随便想象吧了。我会尽力维持我们的感情，但愿你也会。

考期的逼近，让我越来越害怕。好但是自己考不好，我不能在失败了。宜薇，一定要加油喔！！！

2007-11-26T11:51:00.000+08:00

感觉上我又再次陷入我人生的低潮期。好讨厌现在的自己，做什么都做不好。讨厌自卑的心理，因为自卑所以对什么事都没有信心。就连自己都看不起自己，我不指望其他人会对我好，不会看不起我。希望这一切都会很快的过去。

当我星期五看见我的弟弟时，我吓了一跳。他的左眼被人达到黑青。我真得很生气。不管是有心也好，无意也吧，看到他的伤势如此靠近它的眼睛，我就觉得很心痛。他星期四受伤，我却等到星期五晚上才发现，我觉得我好像没有尽到做姐姐的责任。好难过。。。

What Your Handwriting Says About You

You are a laid back person with rather low energy. You aren't lazy... you *are* sensitive and empathetic.

You are somewhat outgoing, but you're not a natural extrovert. You think first before you act. You tend to be independent, rational, and logical.

You are very detail oriented and meticulous. You are a careful thinker and a true intellectual.

You need a bit of space in your life, but you're not a recluse. You expect people to give you a small amount of privacy, and you respect their privacy as well.

You are a free thinker. You are unique, open minded, and artistic. You don't care what other people think.

You are a decent communicator. You eventually get your point across, but sometimes you leave things a bit ambiguous.

What Does Your Handwriting Say About You?

I miss my fwens...

2007-11-21T07:57:00.000+08:00

Finally met up with one of the close friends I have in poly yesterday. Super late birthday celebration for me, but never mind lah, its the thought that counts. We were suppose to meet at 5:30pm but that guy was late. Hai... Had dinner at Bakerzin, suppose to have cakes but in the end no time for cakes (Next time bah). We rush to watch "The Game Plan" , haha the show was good, heart warming comedy. *nice nice*. Did some catching up after movie, then went home.

Hehe good to see and talk to 'lao peng you'.

I will always miss my fwens but seems like there is no time for me to meet them, or I don't know want to do when I see them. I think the problem lies with me bah. When I am with those 'active' people, I feel that I am the quiet type, not as active as them. (Of course , I think I should click with the less active people) But I seems a little too active when I am with the less active people.

Whats wrong with my thinkings? Help!!!

Had been very busy lately, my mum had operation, on top of that assignments, Exams are apporaching. As I do not have enough leave, I also try to stay for OT at work. (Busy... Busy... Busy...) Hope I will have more time after 19 Dec 2007...

Jia You Joice!!!

2007-09-27T07:08:00.000+08:00

I was surfing net yesterday and I saw this.

My Sec School Songs

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wP-2cGVVSA8

and this

Around SQS

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5tpa6nF_K5E

OMG I was so surprise, gave YL the add. We ended up chatting about secondary school. I miss my secondary school, the teachers and friends there. Haha, if I were to be a teacher may be I can consider going back to SQS.. Haha...

Wanna post the video here but I don knwo how to. any kind soul around to guide me??

2007-09-24T13:13:00.000+08:00

Nothing much happen last thursady to saturday. its just work, sch and home or work,OT, tkd...

But I miss all my fwens all of them from pri, sec , poly and tkd...

Something happen last night, I cannot comment much cos I know very little. I just hope Darling will make the right choice...

AND today is my unluncky day... Very unlucky. Raining when I come to work, it was so big and does not seems like its going to stop any sooner, so I ran at first was w/o my sandles. After I got to a sheltered place, I wore my sandles.I thought I just had to run across the road, up the stairs and i will reach my workplace so I ran with my sandles. Tragic happens, as I was running up the stairs, I tripped and fell. Cutted my 4 toes, abrasion on my right elbow and hip and there is a swollen bruise under my left knew. Reach office and thought that everytime was over.NO ITs NOT!!!

Got news that I need to repeat some of the test I done on weekend (sian no lunch), then my boss ask me to go MOM. Best, I was so blur there don know which counter to go, and my HP NO BATT cannot call. Call my boss after i got to a public phone. finally everything settle. Hit my hip again when I was about to board the cab. After I got back to office got to know someone repeat the test for me... GD, but just receive a bad news, the certificate I got might have error... SHIT... I don want anymore trouble and injuries...

2007-09-19T16:45:00.001+08:00

Read some of the past entries, it make me missed my poly life even more, NPtkd, the fwens there and my ploy classmates. Those entries motivated me, I must continue my 'Xiao Qiang's spirit'. I will continue to endure.

I had long forgotton Xiao Qiang spirit. I think why some of the people continue to go back NPtkd even after graduation is to keep the memories and to continue having it. Being fwens with students is the best, there are not as vicious and cunning as collagues and cutter also.

Tought of going back to NPtkd, but may be when I am free bah.. NPtkd helped me to loss weight once, I need that again...

Guess I have to contact my fwens and plan for gatherings, really miss them from sec sch mate to poly class mates... I miss all of u...

2007-09-18T11:33:00.000+08:00

Whats going on in my life? Nothing seems to be right.

Went to for class yesterday, found out that majority of the project done on sunday was wrong. So we decided to dicuss about it online after class. I stayed up till 3am. So tired. very very tired.

I am physically and mentally drained. I don't want to play mind game. I want a bed and two days of leave. I just want to slack at home and sleep as much as I can, if this continue my healthy sure got problem.
I want to sleep... sleep...

2007-09-17T16:01:00.000+08:00

Had been sleeping at around 12am and wake up at 6 am from last Monday to Wednesday, this got worst from Thursday onwards. Hope to go tkd on weekends, I went to bed only at 1am, woke up at 6am for work.

Friday, went tkd after work. Hehe do aerobics, remember the time Darling taught BS and me taekwon aerobics. I remember the steps fast, but no sense of rhythm, BS was opp. After class, went for dinner before going home. Went to bed at 12am then woke up at 6am the next day to work OT.

Worked OT for 6 hours (I am happy that I can work OT, more money mah).I am damn tired. Over slept on my way home. Got home, have some food then go tkd. There was a celebration for Yu Wei's bday. Went out for supper after yew tee class.
Bianca, Angel, Jeremy, Jerome, S Pi , XL and my sis was there. I was a little piss off with someone. May be kids nowadays is really different from my times. I still recall how my mum stop me from going out, calling me on my hp to remind me that it was time to go home when I was with the tkd people at the coffee shop opposite my house. Anyway, was surprise by what the kids were doing, so different from my times.
Then someone told her parent that she was with me , (OH Shit, what if the mother come look for me?). After meal it was like 1am le, we were thinking of where to go, don't know who told the kids that I need to go home early. The 'Someone' who mention my name to her mum, said 'Its ALL ur (me) fault lah, u should have told me that we are going back so early mah! The I don't have to call my mum" Please leh, I was very quiet at that time , saying I am okie with going to anywhere. I was so angry with the disrespectful attitudeshe gave me. Yes, to some ppl I am petty. Then take it that I am!
It was already 2am when I reached home, chatted for an hour with my mum . It means I went to bed at 3am, woke up at 7 am prepare for the project discussion and head for bugis national library.

After the project discussion, went for tkd. Saw 'someone' but I am no longer angry le . hehe quite happy that at least I am no longer scare to spar with the kids, I admit that I am useless, I fear sparring with the kids. Glad that I voice out that I want to spar and I got a chance. Got home after 12 am .

Got sch plus work today.I am so tired, too tired to do anything. My mind has been blank the whole day. Slack at work the whole day. I am in a state which my mind is blank and I don't know what to do. Tired really tired.

Another thing on my mind is, I want to change job, I think its time to change. I would consider for a few more days and may be will set my mind to change... ...

2007-09-13T20:38:00.000+08:00

I have lesser and lesser of free time. I am feeling more and more insecure, but people around me are getting less and less sensitive. I am a person whom needs lots and lots of care and concern. I am so uncertain of myself, of the things I do that I requires lots and lots of acknowledgement. But who knows that? Who can provide me with that?

Whats the point of saying you will stand with me, will support me? Yet you don't understand what i am thinking. Told you that I need lots and lots of attention but u are showering me lesser and lesser. Its only the beginning, and you had become like this. Do you understand how I feel? Do you know what I need after i had voice out so many many times?

2007-09-13T01:13:00.000+08:00

Alot of things had been on my mind today, after talking to my sister I become even more troubled. I am so useless as a big sister, I am feel so bad. I feel so inferior, I hate growing up, can I don't grow up.

I have been a person who is always regreting, so I told myself to follow my heart thinking that I will never regret. In the end i was wrong, very wrong. i ended up regreting. Finding excuses allowing myself to make mistakes, again and again, years after years I am still doing that. I never learnt my mistakes.

Things changes as you grow, things are not as simple, easy and lucky. I am no longer like before and I had to face failure, lots and lots of failure. Worst of all, I am making others to pay for my failure. I don't want that, I don want. Can I answer everything myself? Will I be able to handle that? Facing everything alone seems so scary, so fearful.

What will my future be like, can I change now? Is it too late? I am ruining my future with my own hands? I am hurting my parents with my behaviour. I am digging a hole for myself.

Digging, digging and digging.

2007-09-10T07:49:00.000+08:00

Spent my 18th month anniversary with Him... Happy that everything was smooth and we were both happy...

Yesterday also marked the end of my freedom, school is starting today. Got to continue with my tired and stressful life once again...

2007-09-04T11:14:00.000+08:00

How can ayone be so irritating?

I am so irritated by the old man till I decided to be a mute. Hia...

2007-09-04T08:32:00.000+08:00

I am still sick...

Work the whole day plus an hour of OT. Went out for dinner with my family, after 'He' decided to ignore me. Obviously I was not in a good mood, ate and chat very little. However the topic which my family was saying made me think alot.

How to support a family when the husband and wife are earning very little. The total income of the family was only $2 300 without CPF deduction. They got to support the expenses of the only child (not even 1 years old) with that money.

It makes me think of my future, I am earning more than half of their total income but money does not seems to be enough for me. Will I be able to give my kids good life, or average type of lifestyle which I was brought up in? Would my pay be able to reach $2 300, instead of achiving 2K only when my spouse's pay is added in?

Would I be too broke to pay for my kid's expenses? Not able to give them things that they want? Unable to bring them overseas (may be not every year but every two year)? Do I want to get married and face all these problems?

Marriage still seems very far to me, I cannot foresee myself settling down. Rushing home just to prepare dinner, weekends burnt by doing housework are definently a NO to me.

Feeling insecure, no confindence in the relationship is also another factor. Help!!! Who can help me???

Darling , you got to take care of yourself. Although i don think that u would continue to read my blog after I stop blogging for so long. You got to be careful on the road. It hurts me when u simply lose your temper. may be its because u are tired, not in good mood or another. But I will still feel the pain when not treated nicely... I hope everything will be smooth for u, so that u can have good mood to treat me better...

2007-09-03T08:07:00.000+08:00

Had not blog for a few days. had been busy working OT.

Fall sick le, should be cold bah. 3rd Bukit Purmei tounrament held last sat (1st Sep). Was busy, in fact I was in a delimna. Anything in the end I went there, as usual it was for my brother. Lots of things happen, but cannot elaborate here. One thing that i would like to share is " Well done my xiao di er er" I am so proud of him. His opponent was few cm taller than him. When I saw his opponent's first kick that score my brother, I thought my brother was going to lose. My brother proven me wrong. He gave that fellow 3 head kick. by the end of first round the score was 1 vs 6 for the tall guys and my brother respectively. In the end my before round two end, I brother won, 1vs 9. Haha I was so happy for xiao di er er. Hehe... may be others will say I am 'hao lian' but I am really happy for him. hehe Keep it up Xiao Di er er...

hehe cos it was my brother therefore I elaborate a little on his match. Others done well too, Aloysius, Angel, Ern Chi, Edwin, Johnson and others. Some are expected winners and they did not disspointed me like Bianca and Yi Mei.

Thats all for Satuday. Before I end for Saturday, I must thank a few people.

1. My darling, I am gald that he was there even despite the long distance that he got to travel. Thank You darling.

2. The boon lay guys especially Xiao Lang and SP, u guys assisted there so I have more time to look at the match , support the players and also spend a little more time with my darling...

As for sunday , I worked OT despite being sick. Went for lunch with darling. (I think because of thatr, he is sick now). Then went back home, rest before going dinner with my family.

Sad thing happen. That make me very sad, in fact felt hurted but no one knows.

I will keep mum about it...

As for now... One thing in my mind. I WANT TO GO CHINESE GARDEN, for the lantern fesival thingy , i never go before... I WANT TO GO!!!

2007-08-30T07:07:00.000+08:00

Am I someone who do not deserve any respect? I am also a person, a human being. Someone with feelings. What had I done to be treated like this? I hate all these people, I don't know how they gauge if someone deserve they respect, but I know just because I am nice / i am not going the hard way I am treated this way.

If you people think that you are good, go ahead, I should learn from others, not to talk too much, Do not mixed with you guys, hopefully there will be fear. Hopefully these people will fear of me, may be then people will not take me for granted/ fool around with me with no respect.

There is another thing that pissed me off yesterday. At first I asked "A" do I get pay if I offer my help but he say no cause "B" will be there. Of course I will think that "B" is there to subsitute "A" and also covers "A" duties. In the end, "B" did not do much and "C' was blaming me of not doing anything to help. Oh Please, "B" is there to take over "A" and also should covers his role how do I know that I am suppose to help. Yes I am money face, but who not like money?? Who?? "A" wants to take my help as for granted, NO WAY! I am a 小气, 自私, 斤斤计较 person. YES I am!

"C" I understand how you feel, but I hope you can understand my stand too. Sorry "C" I know u will suffer from all this, but if "A" and "B" is going to continue things this way, I think I am going continue my way too. "C" I will try to help secretly (Shhh... ...)

I am in a very lousy mood today,

Don't remember when it started, everything in my life are out of place, nothing is smooth for me. Nothing I do is right.

2007-08-28T07:08:00.001+08:00

I had been busy for the last few days as there was National Tournament going on.

I did not participate, don't have much to say except this:

It doesn't matter what people say (just take their comments as feed back and try to change yourself for the better), you are in the ring not them. Others can only give you comment from a third person's view, only you yourself who is in the ring knows how it feels and what is it like. And I believed that what ever choice you made then would had been your best choice in that scenario. If it was a bad move, take other people's advice and change it.

There is always a saying: " If you had failed, don't fail to learn the lesson."

2007-08-22T16:07:00.000+08:00

Haha his nick now is "I love Joice M'dm"

Having mood swing every now and then, don't know what happen to me. Feel aimlesss and my life had no meaning...

No acheivement in life, body aching everywhere, no motivation for anything... Can someone please help me find back the meaning of my life... I don't want to live like this... I DON'T WANT

I know that I have a caring family which everyone dote on me, a nice boyfriend who is constantly trying to take care of me. But I had not done anything for myself... Is it because I have a good life therefore I don think of other things?? Too satisfied with my life that I am looking for things to distrupt my life?? I don't know ... I just know that I need a target for me to works towards...

2007-08-20T09:08:00.000+08:00

I am in my office now, I should concentrate and work. But I am thinking of him, missing him. would he talk to me, would he contact me, would he think of me???

I miss someone, would someone miss me???

2007-08-19T23:07:00.000+08:00

Went for tkd @gombak yesterday. The Boon Lay boys were here, actually with them around reminds me of the NPtkd. Lessons was alright. When for dinner with the two sirs and the rest. Things starts to turn bad.

I don't know what happen to him , he start to isolate himself. I tried to talked, but no use.

Only today then I realise that he was jealousy that I toked to others. He looked for me after his class cos he want to bring me out but he never told me anything. How would i know?? How??

We had a quarrel, I don't know why things must end up like this. WHY???

2007-08-17T09:42:00.000+08:00

Help.... My head, back and ankle are aching...

Had not blog for a long time, almost forgot that I still have this blog.

I stopped studying for 6 months, rested well... Gonna start studying soon, in september.

Working at the same place, nothing changed.

National Young Junior tournament was help last week, so proud of Bertha, she did fought well haha can tell eveyone proudly that I was her coach... hehe... Junior and Senior tournament is coming, will be held on 25 and 26 Aug. My brother, sister and boyfriend are participating. Wish them all the best. I don't know what can I do to help, felt useless at times.

2007-08-16T15:33:00.000+08:00

You Are 24% Emo

You're definitely not emo, but you do understand emo people a little. You are introspective, but not to the point of driving yourself crazy.

Are You Emo?

You Are 51% Grown Up, 49% Kid

You've grown up a good bit, but you still have a way to go before you're emotionally mature. You have the skills to control your emotions, you just have to use them.

How Emotionally Mature Are You?

What Your Soul Really Looks Like

You are a warm hearted and open minded person. It's easy for you to forgive and forget. You are a very grounded, responsible, and realistic person. People may not want to hear the truth from you, but they're going to get it. You believe that people see you as larger than life and important. While this is true, they also think you're a bit full of yourself. Your near future is in a very different place (both physically and mentally) from where you are right now. For you, love is all about caring and comfort. You couldn't fall in love with someone you didn't trust.

Inside the Room of Your Soul

You Need to Grow Up a Little

You're definitely not a kid anymore, though sometimes it's hard to tell. Your life is somewhat adult, but chances are, you aren't really satisfied with it. Whether this means getting a better job or dumping a loser boyfriend... It's definitely time for you to start living a fully adult life.

Is it Time for You to Act Like a Woman?

You Are 18% Independent

In your opinion, being indie is totally over-rated. After all, if something isn't popular - there's probably nothing to it.

Are You an Independent Woman?

2006-11-05T23:44:00.000+08:00

Had a very tired yet fun day...

Went for tkd today despite having margrian and stomuch ache... Obviously my condition affected me very badly... After the sparring training, it was pattern training... Hehe I slacked by just help out in checking no teaching or doing the patter with the kids...

After which we went to KFC, which was like almost 3pm le... We slacked aroung CWP then went to soeul garden for dinner (total got 8 person)... From that time onwards laughter was with us, every where we go when when we went to Civic center... Had a fun time there with everyone... Too some pictures, but the pics were blur... So sad...

2006-11-04T06:46:00.000+08:00

Finally my exams are over, but I am not happy at all...

Am I going through a changing process??? There are so many uncertainties in my life...

I am immature? I am silly? I created a lot of problems??? I had tried my best to be nice to all of you, from now on... ... NO MORE! No matter what I do, there will always be fault in me??? FINE!! I shall be myself... I am not going to be as obedient as before, no more.... Count me out for your events...

I had been trying hard for the past so many months to built up something, since there is still no improvement; my effort had gone down the drain. I shall stop here.

2006-10-31T20:33:00.000+08:00

Stayed at home the whole day... I am not feeling well...

Stay at home to study and slack ... Felt abit feverish in the afternoon...

Chatted on the phone for awhile just now, so many things that I wanted to say, but I can't... There is nothing much I can say here too...

2006-10-30T23:14:00.000+08:00

Had my exam today... I don't want to talk about it...

Went to Sakura@ Clementi with my parents today. Its my mum's birthday... Ate a lot of things, I was so full till I had skipped my dinner...

My brother went chalet @pasir ris, missed him... NO one to bully for two days...

I feel so lost now, I felt that I am struck... No one is there to help me, I am feeling loss... Alot of things in my mind but I am so unsure of everything... Lost my confident in everything... I am so scare that the history repeat itself... But there is no one to tok to... No one to provide me with the advice... Everytone is either I find it hard to tell them or they are just too busy for me...

Meeting a fwen this friday, hope that I can bring myself to say out everything... But still, I don't know if i should...

2006-10-29T22:56:00.000+08:00

Met up with Darling today...

We almost quarrel in the morning, but things was fine later...

Had dinner at Seoul garden with Juan Meng Sir.. I was very very full, darling is so nice today... Very gentleman and nice to me... Hehe... SO happy...

Shopped around in cwp, the remote control helicopters and planes are so nice... The teddy bears are so cute... I want them!!! After shopping, we when home... And Now...

I got to go back to my books le...

2006-10-29T09:54:00.000+08:00

Had a long chat with my sister last night... The chat should be aroung 3-4hours continously... Chatted a lot and that girl is trying her best to change my mind. But I am really determine this time ( Hope that I did not make the wrong decision)...

Chat with my sister on everything, hope that we can always be like this...

2006-10-28T11:02:00.000+08:00

I had made a very very important decision in my life... I don know it is right or wrong... I was so upsad yesterday caused I felt that I had broke my parents heart by having that decision... I thought I seriourly need to talk to someone but I end up keeping very thing in my heart...

Went to tkd, wanted to do some kicking but no one to hold for me...

Talked to my mummy and dad this morning, I really loved them, they are so understanding and thoughtful to me... I LOVE THEM...

2006-10-27T07:09:00.000+08:00

This is a record of my yesterday's life...

It was a blur day, this is how it goes... ... In the morning at around 8:45am, I went to NP (reached around 9am plus), I wanted to donated blood. But i only realized that the donation drive starts at 11am ( OMG, got to wait around 2 hours???). Luckily, Li Jiao msg me, so I went home to get my books then go SIM study....

Went to donate blood at 3pm, spent an hour from registering to donate blood . Continue to study, before I did something silly while going for out break. When I saw my secondary school mate (while going for break), I told her that he is someone from my sec sch and that LJ don't know him... ( I feel so silly about that, how could I forget LJ was my sec sch mate)... After break, continue to study till 8 plus...

Decided to give darling a surprise, wanted to go to his training ground. Ended up, I took the wrong bus and lost my way. I am so blur man (this is not the 1st time I am going to that training ground)... Luckily, darling picked called my after my many missed calls...

Got back to CWP, then meet Kelvin Sir there... We were in Burger King, and left for Bukit Timah after Burger King close... It was a long chat, for us, from 10pm plus to like 1:15am when I got home...

Honestly, I like to talk to Kelvin sir ( excluding training time) feel that I can learn many things about how to communicating with people, how to portrait myself and the ways handle things...

2006-10-25T22:00:00.000+08:00

Finally my leaves have arrived...

Went to work today, spent half the day assigning my job to others... Today is a unlucky day for me, had been bumping into a lot of things with my head, hand and shoulder. Hia...

2006-10-24T16:34:00.000+08:00

I could not study a single bit... I am feeling terrible... I hate the things around me...

2006-10-24T14:25:00.000+08:00

Have mood swing these two days... A lots of thing appear in my mind...

I feel so lost, yet I don wish to admit defeat. I wanted to be strong yet I can't... The thing I feared most is here, I don't know how to cope with it. I had to put up a strong front in front of my family. I must!!!

I am no longer tough as I thought I was... Exams coming, having chest pain on and off, still have to work plus this problem, I feel so loss. I admit that I have thoughts of ending my life but I cannot. I cannot let people who cared for me worried, I got to make up to my parents for the time that I have neglected them.

I am deeply injured, greatly hurt, it is so painful. It is so hurting to the extend that I cannot do anything, it is haunting me every now and then. I have loss my sense of humor, no more laughter can be seen on my face. No more smiles that come from my heart.

My wish for myself now is :

1) Aim to be a porcupine.

2) Study hard.

I don't know how long would this take, but I have to give it a try.

2006-10-23T22:09:00.000+08:00

Home alone!!!

So scary, luckily I have lappy.

2006-10-18T00:46:00.000+08:00

BLOGGGGGGG... hia.. my mind seems so blank!!! like have nothing inside... Can remember what I had studied... Help ...

This morning reach workplace super early, around 7:10am. I was so sleepy there.

Finally lunch time, had my lunch alone follow by a short nap before I start to work again.

Had my dinner in office , after which I went to sch. Attended class for 2 .5 hours before my darling come to pick me up.

Honestly could not remember much what happen but I think is: We chatted awhile before going to my place. and continue to chat at my place before he leave.

Hope he had left happily, cos i got no impression abt it....

2006-10-09T19:00:00.000+08:00

I just got back from work... TIRED!!!

When to help out in tkd grading, quite boring. Cos I did not do much until last mintue teach a young kid his pa-jang. CMI lah, that boy don't know anything, sian loh... I was not the one who taught him along plus, his stance also CMI... ... Hai, hope he will pass. Even if he fail, don't saythat he was taught by me loh. Less than 10 minutes to teach a primary sch boy who is under stress his pattern??? I cannot loh...

After that, I did not stay back to help K-squad. When home to rest and studied abit. After which, went out for dinner with Kelvin Sir, Striker and my sister to Zhen fa... Chatted alittle. We planned to watched movie but somehow it changed to Party World.

I bit paisei, I think I had been hogging the mike (hehe...)... When straight to bed after i reached home at 1am++.

2006-10-07T06:29:00.000+08:00

I had a lonely mooncake festival... But luckly I have my family so it it still fine...

Work is fine . In school, I had my presentation yesterday, think it went off well...

Oh my god, it was so misty yesterday. Terrible. I had slight breathing difficulty and my throat are irritated. Luckly it is not the seventh month, if not everything would have been made worst.

2006-10-05T22:25:00.000+08:00

I am so sinful today... Haha...

My big big boss is giving everyone a treat. For the first time, I am going to SAKURA. Wow, had been knowing that there is a wide variety of food, but how delicious it is I don know. I am very greedy girl.

I ate three raw oyster, tried oyster for the first time. Yummy! The raw salmon there was nice too... I WANT TO GO BACK AGAIN!!! Sukara is also serve cooked food. Love all of them haha... Not only a heavy lunch. I had cakes at around 4pm it is my colleague's baby first month...

Fast and enjoyable day at work...

2006-10-04T23:52:00.000+08:00

I was suppose to do my homework now, but as I had took off my contacts lenses. Without contant lens and glasses, I feel so blind.

Evrything was alright for the past few days.

Went to my brother's school today, his stupid classmates are too much. I cannot accept the way my brother is being bullied. Talked to his form teacher so hope things would be fine.Nothing much happen today.

His stupid classmates are too much, anyone who bullied my brother would pissed me off immediately including my sister. The is always a limit to playing, once u cross the limit it is bully. I hate people who bully my brother more than those that bullied me. People who are reading my blog, better don bully my brother ( haha!!)

Had not been happy for the whold day as I felt that I am responsiblefor my brother's poor result. I had neglected him alot since I started working. I feel so guilty for not doing my part as a sister but sometimes i also feel that he don't appreciate me and I should just leave him alone. But in the end, I still cannot help to be nice to him.

I just have to manage my time in a better way.

2006-10-02T05:21:00.000+08:00

I back dated again... My mood of facing the first day of the week changed as I recall what happen yesterday... Yesterday was both good and bad day for me... ...

Went for breakfast with my sister, brother and Mr xx. After which I reached home at 12 plus, although I did slack in between but I really concentrate in doing my work when I am working on it. (It is the good part)

And soon the bad part came. Mr XX was with me all along, just as I was half way through my assignment Mr XX is leaving. Of course he did not leave happily. But I was really glad that my family was around and seeing him really cheered me up.

Went for dinner follow by movie (Rob-B-Hoob) with tkd fwens. Kelvin Sir sent us home after that.

Anyone can advice me on the scenario below: Case 1) A girl (A) quarreled with her boyfriend. The boyfriend(B) had planned to go out with her but in the end it was cancelled. A had always suspected something is happening between B and C. On the same day B got a girl (C) to msg A , asking A out to meet their friends.

A felt very disappointed, B used to get A to meg the fwens when they are arranging for a meet up, and now C is doing it. What does this mean ??? What should A do???

Case 2) (continue from above.) A questioned B for his reason of getting C to msg her. In the mid of their angry conversation, B admit that he is two -timing. What should A do???

Case 2) (continue from above.) When A, B and C with another person (D) are together. D was sitting between A and C. A walked over and sat beside C. ( What does this mean???). During that period of time, A walked away as she was not feeling well. B continue to stay with C and D. When B,C and D got to know that A is not feel well ( After A told them) , D accompanied A. B and C only came to take a look at A after awhile. (B still care for A???)

Anyone had comments for the above story??

2006-10-01T08:42:00.000+08:00

I am so stress as I am typing this. Stressed by homework and exams... ...

I did not study or do homework yesterday... Hia... Went to buy a phone yesterday, Nokia 6280...

At first I was very excited about it, but immediate calming down of my mood once I bought the phone. I would actually stop myself from touching my phone when it is charging. Usually I could not resist the temptation of new items...

After buying the phone, I spent the whole afternoon sleeping. Follow by tkd. The kids were cute... haha and they all loved the chocolate snacks that i made... So happy...

Went for dinner after tkd, I love my prata , ' Cheese, Egg, Mushroom prata' all in one... Yummy...

2006-09-30T06:19:00.000+08:00

Got to back date to account what I had done for the past two days before i forget all about it... ...

28 September 2006

Reached my work place and discovered someone who should not touch or logged in my computer at all had logged on to my computer. Quite pissed off by this. The later a uncle in my department is stressing me again. Do this, do that. Have I completed this , have I completed that... Aaarrrgggghhh So frustrated... ...

Went home after work.

TKD always seems to come between us, cannot meet because of tkd... I was very annoyed by that...

But we still met in the end, I was surprised by his appearance at my doorstep. =) went to Fish & Co. @ IMM. SO happy because I managed to forced some salmon down his throat (Haha!!). This time I pay first... Had a short chat under my block before I went home.

29 September 2006

We are supposed to meet for movie after my school. But messenge him to cancel the date after I reach my workplace. I thought WM and CWP are not showing because I could not find the showing time on 28 Sep.

Went to the lab to run some western blot assay ( I was surprised that I was not excited at all when I know that I would be runing assay). As I am in the lab, first-half of the day had past very fast.

Had my lunch alone at NUS, went there to buy a textbook. Haha I it was cheap!( I had friends who bought the similar book at $80 while I got it at $64...) Second half of the day was quite alright too , doing some writing that's all.

Went to school after work, so sleepy did not participate in my classmates conversation, I was practically stone-ing. Went home after school.

In the afternoon, he told me that he had been having bread the whole day so I thought may be we can go out even if we are not meeting for movie. Later I even found out that WM and CWP are actually showing the movie, may be can continue with our previous plan. BUT I was sian by his reply before I told him about watching movie again. He suggested that we can meet with other tkd ppl ( whom i know) at the coffee shop near my place. Sian... he is always tkd lesson and his tkd friends... We cannot go out meh , cannot just have the two of us???

I went to WM to check on the tickets before I called him to do a last confirmation if he still wants movie. That was a WRONG move. Sian... In the end we did not watch movie, we did chat on the phone. It was a bad chat, we did not end up happily.

Practically, due to what happen at last night, I classified yesterday as a bad day.

2006-09-28T05:59:00.000+08:00

Yesterday was ok...
Work seems ok... Had 3 slices of bread with tuna for lunch... Haha I am not dieting ate bread cos it expires today... 3 slices of bread only so drank a lot of water plus biscuit for tea break.

Received my darling's sms at 2 sth, but only look at it at 3 plus. He needs to go JB. I was thinking: Hia... cannot meet again loh. Therefore I thought of blogging :

I need to wake up from my dreams.

Always thought that we cannot meet often is because I am schooling. I will end class quite late therefore it is not advisable to meet as we have to work the next day.

But despite knowing that my schedule for this week is quite slack, he made no effort to meet up with me. I was disappointed.

Therefore I continue to work and planned for my day. I am going to make some chocolate snacks.

Finally reach home at 7pm after buying all the things. Start making what I want before I have my dinner. I used up only 0.5kg of cooking chocolate when I decided to take a break. Just then Darling called. I was surprised because he was supposed to have taekwondo class at that time.

He had punctured the back wheel of his bike. He is calling for help. I tried to contact a lot pf people to ask for contacts of those vehicle service shops, but to no valid. It was already 7 plus, most of the shops are closed. I am useless... Anyway, i took a cab to Boon Lay. I thought the tow car will come very fast so I rush down, in the end the tow car arrived quite late.

After the bike was fixed up, it was already 10pm. Had dinner with Darling. It was a disappointing chat at first. Although got people tell me that I must not put in my 100% when I first start a relationship but I felt that I am cheating the other person if I does that.

BUT DARLING SAID THE SAME THING!!!

Immediate disappointment. I was speechless for a few minutes before before darling assured me that the not 100% was during the time when we are still not an item. He told me actions will proved it, and i will wait to feel it. Haha... that lousy guys tried to change topic at that point of time. Mentioning that he had planned to drop by my house after his tkd lesson. ( Don't know whether is it true , but since he say it I will believe it... I was quite happy after knowing it)...

Had an hour dinner then reached home. I was too tired that I went to bed immediately.... Therefore I am only blogging now.

Sat on Darling's lap on my way from boon lay to the bike service shop at Bukit Batok. The tow car does not have enough space in the passenger's area . Darling hope I never injured your leg.

2006-09-26T22:55:00.000+08:00

TODAY IS NOT MY DAY!!!

Sleep quite late last night, had fun with my brother and sister we were joking and playing Slept only at 1 am.

Woke up this morning, went to work as usual. The 2nd half of my day was quite slack. Went to school to meet my project mates. It was alright nothing to comment about that. Went home at around 8 pm. Sian, home so early. Wanted to go find him, but since he had planned to go tkd so I just go home.

Msged him when I reach home thinking that he went tkd, who knows he called . That lasy bum never go. It was a super short conversation. Hang up by saying talk later cos he wants me to study first.

Tried to study a little. At 10 pm received a msg, saying that he is tired and is going to bed first. Excuse me is that super short conversation suppose to be a chatting session? Sian...

wanted to blog earlier but some problem with the router, so now then I can blog...

I am so super tired... Feeling tired everyday... Help... Hope I can tide through this as soon as possible...

Saw my colleagues who are couple at work, so envy them. Looking at them makes me missed him ....

2006-09-26T00:46:00.000+08:00

I am happy today.

Work as quite slow today, so not stress at all. Had a enjoyable chat with my collengue during lunch time, chatted from fruits to name to educating kids... Continue with my slow pace at work till I finally knocked off at 5pm.

Meeting my darling for dinner, as he definently finish work later than me, I went home first. Finally it is time to meet him for dinner. He was late, at first I was angry but later I become worried. Each time he is late for our meeting or late in msg-ing me I will be worried. Scare that something happen to him on the road.

We had sushi for for dinner . Had fun at Sakae. We ate a total of 19 plates. 1 Cha Soba, 3 kakiage, 1 salmon sushi, 2 fried tofu, 2 potato croqute( don know how to spell), 2 egg sushi plus (I think) 4 plates of Fried Hotate. Today is really fun, joked alot at Sakae. Haha and it was his treat ( Shhh!!! suppose to go on dutch de)...

Shopped around at Westmall , finally bought my swenden ice cream before heading home. Feeling more willing to work hard after such enjoyable time with him.

He also prasied me for the kicking I did for the past two trainings, I must jia you!!!.

Time for bed!!!